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Disagreeing Politely

by with No Comment Muslimeto BlogPositive Islamic Parenting

It’s good for our kids to learn and form their own opinions, and to be able to express their thoughts and ideas constructively. However, it’s more important for them to understand that they must do so respectfully, especially in situations of conflict of opinion or disagreement.

And, since conflict is present in all aspects of life, it’s upon us to teach them that communicating and disagreeing respectfully and politely is how we can work through these conflicts peacefully, strengthen our understanding of others, and maintain good relationships with them. For example, we can tell them the story of the “Hudabiyah Treaty” and how Umar Ibn Al-Khattab (ra) disagreed with Prophet Muhammad (saw) on signing that treaty. They did not cut ties or shame one another, they just saw things differently and followed our Islamic teachings of respecting each other’s opinions.  

Also, knowing that discussions and arguments can’t always go how they wish, and that it is not “my way or no way” is very important. Allah the Almighty (swt), who holds all matters in His hands, says in His holy Qur’an “there is no compulsion in religion” ( Qur’an 2:256) and “Call upon the way of your Lord with wisdom and good counsel” (Qur’an16:125). So, if Allah (swt) encourages freedom of opinion and reasoning with respect and logic, even in religion, shouldn’t we do so too?

Moreover, we should teach them that when we disagree with someone, we shouldn’t make it personal. We shouldn’t hate them just because we disagree with them. However, we should always remember and stick to our Islamic etiquettes and the Islamic teachings of harmony, love, respect, compassion, and co-existence.

Noteworthy, our kids learn by what we do… not what we say, they are our little mirrors. Thus, we should consider how we react in similar situations, how we respect other opinions, how we respect differences, and how we disagree politely.

If you’re still wondering how to start introducing the concept of “disagreeing politely” to your kids, the following five tips will be of great help insha’Allah.

1- Lead by Example

As agreed, no matter how much we guide and instruct them to do something, they only imitate what we do. So, number one is to start with yourself.

2- Allow Them The Opportunity To Discuss

No one learns without practice. Giving our kids the opportunity to argue with us, allows us the chance of guiding them smoothly through the discussion. It gives them the chance to comprehend how we respond and act through discussions and disagreements, and gives parents insight on their child’s real thoughts and views.

3- Teach Them How To Be Good Listeners

We can’t have a healthy discussion if we don’t know how to listen to each other. This makes mastering the skill of listening an essential part of the process. They must know that a good listener doesn’t assume what the other is going to say or keep interrupting them. On the contrary, good listeners listen without judging and they tend to understand more by giving other people time to clarify their opinions and points of view.

4- Introduce The Concept of Conflict

Teaching our kids about the meaning and value of conflicts and disagreements at an early age allows them to better comprehend others and learn to get along in situations of conflict.

5- Acknowledge, encourage, and praise their disagreement resolving skills

Whenever we see our kids acting respectfully and understandingly in a conflict, it’s healthy to show them how proud we are of them and how we appreciate their mindfulness and good behavior.

At the end, we should all ask Allah (swt) to grant us the calmness to manage our anger in times of conflict, the patience to listen, understand and disagree with others respectfully, and the strength to accept that we should agree to disagree at some points.

“Itqan” – The core of  Islamic Work Ethics

by with No Comment Muslimeto Blog

One of the wonders of Islam is that it has always emphasized the importance of work perfection, even describing it as an important act of Ibadah, to the extent that it was mentioned in the holy Qur’an 360 times, in different Surahs, and also in several Hadiths!

Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) says: “No food is better to man than that which he earns through his own hand’s work. Dawud (pbuh) would never eat except from the earnings of his own hand’s work.”, and in Surat An-Najm Allah (swt) says ” That man can have nothing but what he strives for” [Qur’an 53:39]. The Ayah and Hadih show that even prophets strove relentlessly to eat and feed their families from their own earnings; as they chose to lead by example.

Al-Imam Al-Ghazali also narrated that Prophet ‘Eissa (pbuh) once saw a man who had completely devoted himself to worship. He asked him how he got his daily bread, the man replied that his brother, who worked, provided him with food. Prophet ‘Eissa then told him, “That brother of yours is more religious than you are” (The Book of Provision, Chapter 1).

Islam promotes all good qualities like honesty, integrity, respect, and so on, it is only fair that it requires and encourages every Muslim to attain and embrace good work ethics and manners. One of the most important qualities is “Itqan” or perfection, because we must strive and work hard to do our best. Our beloved Prophet Muhammad says “ Verily, Allah loves that when anyone of you does something, he does it perfectly”, and thus we should follow his guidance and strive to attain the highest level of focus, understanding, and accuracy to reach this goal Insha’Allah. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’la promises us that those who do so “will be fully rewarded” [Qur’an 53:41].

Here are some great tips that will help you start off on the right track InshaAllah!

1- Limit distractions

We all get distracted once in a while by a notification on our phones or a message. These distractions interrupt our thoughts, waste our time, and they make going back to the task at hand more difficult; as most of the time we forget where we left off. Instead, let’s focus on our tasks and keep our phones on silent mode. Most phones now have a “focus mode” that can be set with specific preferences to ensure that we are focused on tasks during work times.

2- Improve your time management skills

Plan your time ahead. Don’t push things to the last minute before the deadline. It’s better to plan ahead, estimate how long a task may take, and work accordingly. Studies show that an hour of focused work is more productive than three hours of last-minute work. Besides, last-minute work leads to higher stress levels, nobody wants that!

3- Avoid multitasking and go by a “to-do list”

At this point, it is important to plan and arrange your tasks according to the level of priority. Most importantly, try to avoid doing more than a task at a time. Remember that although multitasking may feel efficient, it actually reduces our overall productivity and leads to more stress, again … who wants that?!

4- Expand your horizons

Read books and watch videos that help you attain new skill sets. This falls under self-development; it adds to your intellect and those who know you are sure to benefit as well from any new-found knowledge that you can bring with you to work or even casual talks. The Best thing is that this will help you come up with fresher and more creative ideas by thinking out of the box.

May Allah (swt) give us the strength and determination to attain such level of perfection, amen.

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Prophet Eissa’s Miracles 

by with No Comment Christmas in Islam

During this time of the year, many Muslim families find themselves confused about what to tell their kids about Christmas. In fact, we can use this festive time of the year to teach our kids about Prophet Eissa (as), Assayeda Mariam (ra), their miracles, and their story in the Holy Qur’an. Prophet Eissa (as) is one of the Prophets we’re to love, cherish, and imitate. His story is mentioned in several verses of the Qur’an to convey what a great person and role model he is. The Ayahs also narrate what he’s been through, display his miracles, and affirm that he worshipped Allah (swt) alone.

In this article, we will cover some of the miracles of Prophet Eissa (as); that are mentioned and verified by the holy Qur’an.

His Miraculous birth

We all know how Prophet Eissa (as) was born to a virgin mother, Assayeda Maryam. It was amazing how she became pregnant although no man has ever touched her. In Surat Al-‘Imran, she asks Jebril (as) “how can I have a child when no man has touched me” and he replies “Thus it is: God creates what He wills: when He wills a thing He need only say, Be, and it is.”

Speaking in the cradle

When people started accusing Assayeda Maryam of committing a sin, she pointed to her child. The people asked sarcastically “How shall we talk to someone who is a child in the cradle?” Qur’an 19:29, Baby Eissa then replied ” I am God’s servant. He has given me the Book and made me a prophet; He has made me blessed wherever I may be, and has enjoined upon me prayer and alms giving throughout my life.” Qur’an 19:30-31

Breathing life into a clay bird, Healing the blind and the leper, and Bringing back the dead

These miracles were to prove that he (as) is a messenger from Allah (swt). He performed them with the permission and will of the Almighty to persuade his people to believe him and follow his guidance. They were also mentioned in the holy Qur’an, in Surat Al-‘Imran where Prophet Eissa says “I have come to you with a sign from your Lord. I will make the shape of a bird out of clay for you and then breathe into it and, by God’s leave, it will become a living bird. And by God’s leave I will heal the blind and the leper and bring the dead to life. And I inform you of what you eat and what you store in your houses. Indeed in that is a sign for you, if you are believers.” Qur’an 3:49

Last but not least, it is important to teach our kids that Prophet Eissa was an exceptional figure and role model and even though there is debate on the exact day on which he was born, we as Muslims do deeply cherish and believe in him and his message as a prophet of Allah (swt) <3

Communicating Clearly

by with No Comment Positive Islamic Parenting

We all want nothing but the best for our kids… and this is where our role as parents comes in! Equipping them with the necessary skills they need to achieve success and happiness in their lives is a big part of our job as parents.

The first place to start is “Effective communication”, which is a key life skill!

Prophet Muhammad for example, (pbuh) was the most eloquent; He spoke in such an effective and positive way that made people love listening to Him. He (pbuh) also listened to people attentively and with respect in such a way that others also loved talking and opening up to Him. That’s why, Islam’s objectives of harmony, respect, and peace could not be conveyed if it weren’t for clear communication.

Instilling effective communication skills in our kids at an early age is of great importance. It helps them express themselves clearly and convey their feelings in a better way. It also boosts their social IQ and helps them build healthier relationships. Moreover, it facilitates their learning process, making it easier to exchange and comprehend information with and from others.

Here are some basic communication skills that every kid should learn and develop as a start!

1- Making eye contact with the person they are talking to.

This is a sign of showing interest and respect for the other person.

2- Learning to speak clearly and correctly.

Correcting their pronunciation and grammatical mistakes smoothly is the key at this point.

3- Mastering the art of joining a conversation.

As parents or guardians, we should teach our kids how to join a conversation smoothly and politely. we should also guide them to respect the person who is talking and not to interrupt an ongoing conversation.

Luckily, like any other skill, our kids’ communication skills can be improved with practice and activities BUT how can we do this as parents? The following tips are a good start, insha’Allah. 

1- Initiate and encourage conversations and discussions whenever possible.

2- Listen to them attentively and make sure you understand them right.

3- Read stories together to expand their vocabulary and enhance their cognitive abilities.

4- Coach them to respect the rights of others in a conversation by “taking turns”.

Also, these 3 popular activities and games are great ways to add fun and joy while you’re at it!

1- The telephone game

This game is a great way to enhance listening skills. It is fun and the whole family can play together. We start by sitting in a circle, then a person whispers a message into the ear of the player sitting on his/her right, who then whispers it into the ear of the player sitting on his/her right as well, and so on until we reach the last person in the circle. This person reveals the message out loud.

It’s really fun; kids can start with a simple message and gradually progress to more complex ones.

2- Picture Storytelling  

This game is a highly creative one! It starts by providing kids with a set of pictures and asking them to arrange the pictures in a logical sequence. We can then ask them to create a story out of those pictures. Also, asking them to describe the details on these pictures: the colors, scenery, ideas, and so on adds more to this great game.

3- 20 Questions  

This is a perfect game where you have kids stand in a circle, while one of them stands in the middle. This kid in the middle should then think of a famous place, person, etc.. The other kids in the circle try to identify this famous place or whatsoever by asking a set of 20 questions; to which he can respond only with “yes” or “no”.

And, the list goes on… May Allah (swt) protect them all and guide us in raising them properly and in overcoming the challenges we face with wisdom, amen.

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Accepting Differences

by with No Comment Positive Islamic Parenting

Raising Muslim kids in Western countries is often a real challenge/struggle for both parents and their kids. They get more exposed to different cultures, lifestyles, opinions, and beliefs.

As parents, it’s upon us to teach our children to respect all people and accept their differences. We can do this smoothly by following our religion’s teachings regarding this matter. Let them know that in the eyes of Islam, all human beings deserve respect and that the holy Qur’an views tolerance, respecting others, and accepting differences as vital steps in becoming better Muslims and establishing greater peace overall.

In many Ayahs and hadith, Allah (swt) and Prophet Muhammad guide us to treat everyone kindly and with the utmost respect, confirming that we are all different from each other. Even as Muslims, we come from different countries and backgrounds and vary in national cultures. However, we all come together under the tenets of Islam. Likewise, with non-Muslims, we should share the principles of humanity, acceptance, and respect. For example, Allah (swt) says in Surat Al-Isra’a “And We have certainly honored the children of Adam and carried them on the land and sea and provided for them of the good things and preferred them over much of what We have created, with [definite] preference.” (Qur’an 17:70)

In the above Ayah, Allah (swt) shows how much humankind is honored and that respecting them is a birthright, regardless of their communities, beliefs, race, and backgrounds.

Thus, respect for mankind is one of the basic teachings of Islam. We’re to teach our kids and ourselves that everyone is worthy of respect; despite their differences. Moreover, helping them to learn a method to avoid such conflicts while keeping the same respect would be a great tool for which they’ll forever thank us.  

Now, we know what we should teach our kids, but do we know how? These three tips will be a great start Insha’Allah.

1- Normalizing the idea of differences

Teaching our kids that we’re all born unique with different looks, preferences, and qualities is a major step in the process. We can do this by arranging play dates with people who are different from us and helping them get along.

2- Presenting the concept of empathy

Allowing our kids to figure out their feelings and putting themselves in other people’s shoes, gets them to know how different situations might negatively affect their emotions. It might also help if they are in charge of taking care of a pet or a plant; this allows them to partake in helping a living thing grow or bloom.

3- Boosting the topic on every related occasion

Keep the conversation going and always advise them to accept and respect all differences. We can use playtime to demonstrate some different situations and how to deal with them; in a fun and light way.

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Ramadan Kids’ Activity Book

by with No Comment Kids' Activities & Resources

This Ramadan-themed activity book for kids allows them to have fun while learning. There are two versions to suit the needs of each child’s age group: ages 4 – 7 & ages 8 – 12.

This book includes:

. Ramadan tips from Muslimeto experts!

. Facts about the Holy Month of Ramadan

. Arabic alphabet practice sheets

. A Ramadan daily journal

. An activity log for exercise and healthy eating habits during Ramadan

. Ramadan themed coloring pages

Download For Ages 4 - 7
Download For Ages 8 - 12
salah tracker

Salah Tracker Templates Nov 2017

by with No Comment Salah Tracker Templates

As every Muslim family should encourage their children to perform the five daily Salah(s) when they reach seven years old, we made “Daily Salah Tracker” templates to easily track and reward your children’s daily Salah on a weekly basis.

The templates are individualized with themes for girls and boys with a space for your child to mark a star for each Salah; it’s very easy to use. Once you start using it, you will see great progress within a few weeks, Insha Allah.

How to use the template

  1. Mark a “star” after each Salah.
  2. At the end of each day, write the total count of the 5 daily prayers (5/5 is a full mark) for praying all five prayers of the day.
  3. On the last day of the week, write the total count of the 35 weekly prayers (35/35 is a full mark) for praying all 35 prayers of the week.​

      Bonus: get creative with defining bonuses, like 2 stars instead of 1 when praying at the Mosque…etc. 

At the end of each week, take the total number of points and add it to your rewards/points system that you have in place for the house rules.

Don’t forget to reward your child and put a smile on his/her face!

Download​
Click below to view and download the template(s).

Daily Salah Tracker – Rocket Green (Boy)   . View, Download & Print .
Daily Salah Tracker – Airplane Blue (Boy)  . View, Download & Print .
Daily Salah Tracker – Girl Pink (Girl)  . View, Download & Print .
Daily Salah Tracker – Toy Pink (Girl)  . View, Download & Print .
Daily Salah Tracker – Girl Purple (Girl)  . View, Download & Print .

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We release new templates and utilities on a monthly basis.
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